This picture was taken the day we got home from the hospital. Getty was three days old and I was three days into being a mother. I think what is very special about this picture is that neither of us knew much about each other. I knew nothing of being a mother. Getty knew nothing of being a human being. But here we were, two tired ladies sleeping peacefully next to each other as though starting this new life together……..after the nap of course.
Since this picture, our position has not changed. I still sleep on the left and you have the right. Our bed is a little bigger, yet you still find a way to take over the entire queen bed.
You are my daughter and I am your mother, but I truly feel as though those titles do not come close to explaining the bond we have with one another. We are partners in crime, truth be told. 🙂
I love being your companion. I love the way you greet me with a smile in the morning and the twinkle in your eyes right before you go to sleep. I often stay awake just to watch you fall asleep. I also find that instead of napping with you, I stay awake to listen to you sleep. I enjoy watching you explore your world and I am so proud of all that you have and will accomplish.
Selfishly, I do have moments of sadness, thinking of what this disease has taken from me as a mother. I wish I could pick you up and hug you and swing you around, but I am more than happy with laying next to you or holding you up just long enough to give you a little kiss. I wish we could walk together, holding hands, but what I do get to do instead is receive your sweet love taps that you give when we hold hands. When you caress my hand it warms my heart and takes away whatever “mommy need” I thought I was missing. There are moments that I long for us to have a conversation, but instead I get to hear your giggle and I get to experience your snarky/sacratic personality. Getty, you have impeccable timing which leads me to believe you know exactly what is up and it is up to me to figure out how you have made a joke, perhaps at my expense. 🙂 I’d take that over any silly conversation.
You are my world and I thank whomever brought you to me, every day. You have brought so much to my life; you have made me a better person, you have made me mother.
I thank you for giving me a different kind of purpose to life. A different perspective on life. An enhanced passion to love.